I am writing this with a heavy heart. I am feeling unable to move. My mind feels numb. How did I get here, in this place, in this time? Am I going to be stuck here? People around me are all moving. Even that at such speed that I cannot fathom to be their equivalent, forget about surpassing them in this race I have joined when I was born. Once you lose control, all you seem to be able to do is crash and burn. I do that all the time. I know that “Live free, Die young” is a stupid way (at least the latter half is); but I am going to die far sooner than I want it to be. I want to be here in this world for eternity.
My friend is sitting here with me. He wants to cry very hard, but being a boy, it is not easy for him. He was always told crying is for girls. If someone asks him, what’s wrong? He is just going to laugh it off. He just asked me to save him. But who am I ? I am just another lost soul; just like him. As I have said before, even I need saving. I want to be saved. So that I can grow old. Needless to say, the only one that can save my friend is himself. The only one that can save me is myself. But we are hurt by our own minds, and our mind has the most impact on us. Have we understood the world wrong? Have we missed something that other people have found? Deny it all you want, your mind is the one in control, always. Unless you have a mental condition, I cannot help you with that. You will not die in peace. Nobody dies in peace. It’s just a different kind of mental war for everybody.